Inner Path Coaching, LLC

August 24, 2008

Change-How to Roll with It

Change always happens, but often times the movement of change is subtle and unnoticeable in our daily routines and distractions of daily living. Sometimes it comes in happy forms such as a new baby, a new home, or an exciting relationship. However, when change comes in the form of illness, accidents, job loss or changing relationships, we view it as more of a challenge, and often can be stuck, depressed, angry and not sure of what to do next.

This summer I found myself dealing with unwanted change and unfortunately depression soon followed it. This forced me to re-evaluate and re-direct my energy. No matter how many times I go through tough challenges I have come to understand that CHANGE IS LIFE and that I always eventually adapt. Sometimes, I just don’t like it and am not very gracious about it’s presence in my life.

The five stages of grief do come into effect with the big life changes and they are not to be denied or swept away. Change can make you cranky, tired, depressed as well as energized and ready to try new things.

It is helpful to find value and meaning within the experience. Either way, life changing events pull us to grow and often more then we want, to accept and adapt.

Useful tips when it comes to change:

  • Let go of what “was” even when you don’t know what “is” yet.
  • Remind yourself that often your life choices led you to the change you are experiencing.
  • Change often leads to bigger and better things (even when you can’t see it or don’t want to hear it!)
  • Change is always happening but we mostly notice it when we are forced to do new things.
  • Accept where you are.
  • Create forward motion, one step at a time.
  • Realize it is OK that you might not have the answers because maybe you haven’t ever had THIS challenge before.
  • Accept responsibility for your actions and be kind to yourself.
  • Change is the vehicle for growth and it is simply a part of the human experience.

July 30, 2007

Connect the Dots

Filed under: Life Choices, Life Coaching, Women's Empowerment — innerpathcoaching @ 7:23 pm

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Do you ever get the feeling that your life is filled with a jumbled mix of events, challenges and experiences? Is there any connection to each of these things? Lately, I have been asking myself if I can see connection to all the things I choose to do in my life.

There are some basic themes that I am well aware of. But, sometimes there are little things in my life that I am not sure exactly why I placed them there.

One thing I have found helpful is to really look at all the things I have brought into my life and question if I see any “themes” presenting themselves. Is my life connected, or is it filled with relationships and tasks that don’t necessarily have meaning?

Lately, I have seen more connectedness to my choices even when I did not really think some of them out. This past week I was feeling a bit overwhelmed by a volunteer position that I took on with the Junior League. I wondered why I had made a choice to be a co-chair of a committee that requires a fair amount of work when I am a single mom and self employed. (What the heck was I thinking?) While I was lamenting this, a quick insight popped in and I realized that the program I am helping organize with Junior League aligns with my higher life purpose.

The program that I assist with is called, Especially Me. It is a self esteem program for girls ages 9 to 12. My purpose with my career is to help women who are struggling with relationships and career and want a balanced and empowered life. The Especially Me program is designed to help empower young girls with information about puberty and their own abilities to make positive choices. So as I connect my dots, it helps me to accept and engage in this volunteer position.

It is a great question to ask oneself if all the tasks, roles and relationships in your life, align with your values, purpose and desires. Asking yourself what your motivation is behind activities and events is a powerful way to discover if you are engaging in things that matter to you.

What dots connect for you? And are there some meaningless meandering dots that simply don’t fit and could be removed?

While being a volunteer for Junior League isn’t always my favorite thing to do (sorry to my fellow volunteers!) I can’t help forget the face of a 10 year old girl this summer when she handed me proudly a homemade gift she made at the conclusion of our Especially Me class. She was a great reminder that I am connecting my dots and making a difference not only to her, but to my own values.

See what momentum you have created. Do the dots connect? If so…celebrate and enjoy! If not…make the changes that lead you to living a life of your own choosing. If you don’t connect the dots, no one else will.

Sandra Wood is founder and owner of Inner Path Coaching, LLC. She coaches women who are struggling with relationships and career and want a balanced and empowered life.

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